Relational Real Estate

Years ago when I was studying for my license, I assumed that the real estate business was pretty much all about real estate, and indeed my early focus was largely on familiarizing myself with the different types of listings that we handle as agents.

The brokerage where I started out had offered 36 classes on a broad range of real estate topics: One week we would learn about septic systems, the next about geologic hazards. We spent several weeks going over contracts that were used for different types of transactions and categories of real estate, and we learned skills like analysis and disclosure that are crucial to negotiation as well as to help people make informed decisions.

Once I was able to bring these skills into the real world, my path took the direction of whatever were the needs of the clients I was working with at the time. Rather than turn down an opportunity in a category I wasn’t familiar with, my approach was to seek out assistance from other more experienced agents around me until I was able to pick up the necessary skill sets to effectively handle a broad range of different transactions. 

What I learned along the way was the importance of a whole additional group of skills which they hadn’t taught in the real estate courses or classes I had taken. Skills like scheduling and time management, research and observation, or fact-finding and of negotiation. 

Amongst the most important of these were developing my level of empathy, accessibility and clear communication, because in the end most transactions represent the intersection between the hopes and aspirations of different parties who would otherwise not have met, and who often have opposing goals. And the chances for a positive result for the parties involved rest largely on whether you are able to help that intersection occur smoothly.

Therein lies the foundation of what I have come to refer to as relational real estate, where the focus is on aligning seemingly disparate interests in a way that everyone is able to come out with their desired outcome. There are many different approaches for making this possible, but for me the most effective means have generally involved being able to get the parties to align around a common goal, which tends to lead to less confrontation and more of a collaboration.

With the advent of technology, the tools we use once a collaborative environment is reached have evolved considerably, and some of my favorites include being able to set up shared text and email threads, shared calendars and project management systems to help the various parties get the information they need and stay connected throughout the process. 

As long as the original objective was correctly aligned and everyone involved is able to remain on the same page and have their needs effectively conveyed and met, the key to success lies in people making good choices. And I have found over time, given the opportunity to make the right choice based on sound information, most people do.